The gag rule

G has instituted a policy of silence covering all matters related to my current gravid state.  His view is that, considering the risks involved, all that we can do is wait until we actually have something, good or bad (please good?), to talk about.  My initial response to this was a vehement tongue wag, accompanied by a na-na-na-na-na-naaaaaa, because I have a BLOG and I can go there to talk about whatever I want!

But then I realized that he’s right.  Sure, I could talk about the state of my boobs or the fact that I feel nauseous and exhausted and generally, optimistically MISERABLE.  But experience has taught me that none of that guarantees that my life with soon be turned upside down again by the arrival of a tiny, needy, well-loved human being.

And so I wait.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

My first OB appt. came and went with nothing more than an order for bloodwork and some surprisingly kind words about doing the best that she can to monitor me along the way.  Actually, it was quite a relief if you consider that I was fully prepared for a thorough scolding along the lines of: What are you thinking by trying to do this again?  You SUCK at pregnancy and I am tired of delivering your dead babies!

Luckily, I had my answers well prepped in advance:  Um, well, it was actually, erm, kind of an accident (cue red cheeks and averted eyes).

So I must leave you for now to contemplate the absurd predicament of a woman who has nothing to say about the only thing that has occupied her mind for an entire month.

Ultrasound on Tues.  Positive thoughts welcome!


7 thoughts on “The gag rule

  1. I have definitely been biting my nails, so thank you for not extending the gag rule here. No news so often means bad news…

    I can imagine that not going over the possibilities endlessly can be a good policy. Of course, if it were me, it would just mean I’d have to do it alone, in my head.

    The idea of your OB saying she’s tired of delivering your dead babies made me laugh in the most unseemly way. It’s not funny, but you know, it totally is. I see her with her hands on her hips, heaving a huge sigh.

    Ohmygod Tuesday is tomorrow! Best quality good thoughts headed your way.

  2. I am thinking of you and am sending healthy and happy thoughts for you, both tomorrow and as things continue forward! The waiting us so freaking hard!

    And I completely understand the gag rule. We had one, too, so much that people were often shocked to see me in person. Yay for blogs!

    We will all be here, waiting alongside you!

  3. Maybe the lack of a desire to articulate your feelings is a pregnancy symptom too! 🙂 I am anxiously awaiting your scan, which I fully expect to be normal and healthy!!!

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